Don’t Burn Bridges; Take the High Road Instead

Janette’s Story

recommendation-lettersJanette approached the burning bridge after being downsized from her job.  She was not pleased with being terminated and made this clear to her now former boss, Danielle.  Janette was the top sales person in the company and believed that she was being let go because she was also the highest paid sales person.  She felt the company would hire someone half her age at half what she was paid.  After all the business she brought in, how could this company be so ungrateful and greedy? Janette and Danielle said things to each other in the heat of the moment that; if given the chance, they would take back and apologize for.

“Come cross me while you can,” the burning bridge coaxed Janette.  Get away from that place.  Look what they did to you after 18 years of loyal and commendable service.  Your ego and pride don’t need to be treated like this. Cross the bridge, move on with your life, and be done with them forever.”

Janette responded out of anger, fear, and humiliation and, without much thought and acting from pure emotion, she crossed the burning bridge.  As soon as she got safely to the other side, the bridge turned to ashes.  There was no turning back.

Lewis’ Story

Crossing_BridgeLewis approached the burning bridge after being terminated from his position as an accounts receivable manager.  He had served the company well for over 12 good years, and consistently ensured solid cash flow by managing the company’s accounts receivable.  He had an impeccable reputation for collecting outstanding money without offending customers. Unfortunately, one of Lewis’s subordinates made a serious error that cost the company a lot of money, and Lewis and his subordinate were terminated as a result.  After contributing to the company for 12 years, Lewis was angry and believed he was made a scapegoat to protect his boss.  He made it crystal clear to his former boss, Tucker, that he did not believe this action was fair, warranted, or even logical. Tucker should have supported him.  They both said things to each other in the heat of the moment that they otherwise would not have said; and would apologize for if they gave each other the chance.

“Come cross me while you can,” the burning bridge said.  Get away from that place.  Look what they did to you after 12 years of loyal and commendable service.  Your ego and pride don’t need to be treated like this.  Cross the bridge, move on with your life, and be done with them forever.”

Lewis thought about it. Yes, he was hurt. Yes, he was offended.  After all he had given the company over the years; he deserved to be treated better and with more respect.  After all, his successes over the year far outweighed this one mistake.  Yes, he was fearful of the future and humiliated with his present situation but he decided not to cross the burning bridge.  Instead, he took, at the time, the more difficult route and circumvented the burning bridge.

Though it took a lot more energy and discipline, Lewis made it to the other side without crossing the burning bridge. When he turned and looked back, the bridge was intact.

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Two months later both Janette and Lewis were offered new jobs that were dependent on getting favorable recommendations from their former employers.  In order to secure the recommendations, both had to return to their respective employers and ‘mend fences.’

x19643693There was only one challenge: both had to cross the bridge to return to their employers to get good recommendations.

Lewis crossed his bridge, met with his former boss, and got the recommendation that assured him of his next job.  Janette returned to the bridge she burned and failed to get the recommendation and the job.

Morale: Burning bridges just won’t get you anywhere. Burning bridges is a strategy that is arguably the poorest investments you can make in your future.  In the heat of the moment, beware of burning bridges and take the high road instead.